Amazing stuff, bad and good

Some good things first -- Happy Birthday, Liv!  We love and miss you! 

And Happy Birthday, brother-in-law, Walter!  We wish we could see you more often!

Bad stuff. 

Our hearts are going out to the folks at Fort Hood.  Lillian and I have been talking about how something like this can happen, but it doesn't change how shocking and deeply, incredibly sad it is.  Prayers, good energy, positive thoughts are all sent to those damaged folks in Fort Hood.

Great Stuff (with a little bad stuff mixed in to keep it spicy).

REF. 71 was approved!

According to AP and all the other pundits and mathematicians, there's no way Ref. 71 can be defeated.  With a 5 point lead in the voting and most of the uncounted ballots coming from King County, which is hugely in favor of us, it's a done deal.

Granted, Larry and his buddies won't concede and they're gonna fight it to the bitter end, but the fact is, we get to keep our rights.

Now, there are some sour folks who are saying that we shouldn't be happy with equal domestic partnership benefits.  They're saying things like "Isn't that nice.  A new form of Jim Crow laws."  And they're right.  I'm not arguing that.  Separate but equal is never equal.

And we won't BE equal until we're recognized by the federal government, and until our relationships carry the same weight and connotations as marriage.  That's also true.  So the sourpusses have a valid complaint and I can't deny it.

However.

Consider this. 

This the FIRST TIME EVER that gay rights have been put to a vote, by the people, and have passed in our favor.

Ever.

Them's no small potatoes, folks.

Back in 1997, as I understand it, a small version of gay rights were put to the vote here in Washington State, and it was all about non-discrimination in the workplace.  It was soundly defeated.  Just about 60 to 40.

That didn't at all deal with anything personal, like families or health care or adoption or religion or any of the hot-button topics we hear about today.  That was simple workplace protection and it went down in flames.

Twelve years is a long time to live through, but from a political standpoint, it's really fast.  And in that time, Washington has gone from "gays don't need protection at work" to "all families deserve equal rights". 

Bloody huge!

The interesting thing is going to see how this plays out in the big picture.

This is how gay marriage got set up in Vermont.  They had civil unions for several years, folks learned that the world didn't stop turning, that gay marriage wasn't being taught in kindergarten and that churches still had the right to say "no" to marrying gay couples, and so it was a no-brainer for them to legalize gay marriage when all was said and done.

And maybe that's the way to get things done in the rest of the country.  Pass domestic partnership bills, gradually increase the rights until, like Washington, gay couples have all the rights, responsibilities and benefits of marriage without the names.

Because it's the words that hang people up.  Even NOM (who loathe us) admitted that us having civil unions/DPs is fine.  They just object to us using their words.

So once everyone in the country has the same rights, just some under "separate but equal" terms, it won't be a long haul to establishing the difference between civil and relgious marriage, and after that it's kind of *shrug*/whatever.

And one thing that perhaps the opponents of gay marriage don't quite realize is that, by giving us completely equal rights without the controversial words -- marriage, husband, wife -- they've actually put a huge roadblock in the way of us getting gay marriage.  If anything, gay marriage opponents should be ENCOURAGING every State to offer us Everything-But-Marriage rights.

Because with that, they can quite reasonably argue that we no longer NEED marriage because we've got all the rights.  And if the federal government recognizes our unions and DPs, then there's no reason for us ever to want to infringe on those terms.

Which isn't strictly speaking true, at least not at this point in time, since the connotations of what it is to be married is still considered to be more important and valid that being in a civil union or a DP, but perhaps in time that will change too. 

Interesting times, my friends, with huge changes, and we're on the leading edge.

Now, however, we need to turn our focus to helping other States who have similar issues facing them, as well as hounding our legislators about things like, oh, I dunno, affordable health care for everyone, ending workplace discrimination once and for all, and repealing DADT.

Which takes me back to the bad stuff from the top.  I do hope that those who were wounded heal quickly, that the families of those who were killed find peace, and that if someone who was killed or injured was gay, that their families are treated with respect and honor, like their straight colleagues.  Because those bullets didn't care about anyone's sexual orientation, and neither should we.

Comments

[Kathy]

We will have to wait on Fort Hood. Too many unknowns to speculate. I am sorry he got to kill so many before someone with a gun got to him.

Ref. 71. I am so glad it passed. And, self centered, I am hoping it is only the next step to society looking at not only who we give benefits to but also to the why. Those, who like me, are solo, are still left out of those benefits. I know, selfish thoughts. But I do think it is time to look at why we give those benefits and how we could really make all of us equal. Perhaps this is just too weird or obscure. If we, society, want to limit those benefits to families of officially committed partners, well then, we singles just don't get those benefits. Ff we, society, want to promote sharing even if they do not involve intimate partners, then perhaps it is time to discuss the "why" not just the who. Well, just my evening ramblings for tonight. The hail has stopped and the wind has died down. It was nice to hear while it lasted. Thanks for listening, Fran.

[Lillian]

Last I read, he survived and was in stable condition. The others taken in for questioning were released.

[Dina]

Happy little dance on Ref 71 passing. Yay, progress! Every little bit helps. Goodness knows there is more needed, but every little bit helps.

[Fran]

Kathy, I'm intrigued. Aside from taxes, which are huge suckage and totally not equal, from payroll to inheritance, how else can things be made more equal for a solo? Everything else, medical decisions, pension inheritance, all that stuff, implies that there has to be another person involved. So I'm curious.

[Deanna]

I agree with Dina, every little bit helps, and we will get there. I wish it were sooner than later, so we will keep working and supporting and doing what we can to treat everyone withthe love and respect that all Children of God deserve.(Yep, 60's child alright, a "God doesn't havve any grandchildren" poster hung on my wall for years.)